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Monday, November 28, 2011

Scarlet Pimpernel

I seek it everywhere, everyday. My own Scarlet Pimpernel, the message, the armot-piercing bullet that passses through my kevlar defense - love, you are worthy Kelly, you can feel peace, you can feel happiness. So far, no response, a voice and ear straining for the slightest sound. I fear it is too late, kind words made me saddder, praise slides off unabsorbed. My kevlar - undeterred - thickens. I feel bad.

I need just to plug into this thing and have it identify, assess, translate all these feelings, it's a big mess in there, anger, sadness, despair, hate, for starters. but not love, just ugliness. My spirit rises only to be crushed under a tiny, ridiculous bootheel. For a few moments there was happiness, a sense of accomplishment, som hope, hey it's gonna be ok. No as it turns out.  it will never be.

1 comment:

  1. It will, silly beautiful heart-on-her-talented sleeve goose.
    I think I've figured you out, where all the other "professionals" have failed. There is the real and true Kelly, the one with the biggest heart on the planet who feels and loves way too much. She is a spritely wonder of a woman with the soul of a girl and she attracts and gives love at every single turn. Then there is the fake Kelly, and she can be a total bitch sometimes. She takes the real Kelly and stomps on that tender heart of hers; she injects her with overdoses of fear and loathing and insecurity. The only way you're going to feel better is to kick that bitch in her skinny evil ass and tell her she's not welcome.

    You're the only one who doesn't realize that the real Kelly is one in a million. Pretend the bad one is a renter who hasn't paid up and kick her the hell out. I'm telling ya, that's the best possible use for your bootheel.