I am feeling unmotivated (mired) this morning. I have a lot of art to make, arrange, organise for a new event that promises to be be fun and fruitful and full of networking and reconnecting possibilities. I think sometimes as I approach a deadline this rebellious factor rises up in me as a way to take power but really I am just taking power from myself. I wonder if therein lies the true nature of procrastination. When I examine it, there is definitely an element of rebelling, of stubborn clinging to a position (even if said position is not particularly useful/healthy/helpful) until my fear of embarrassment surpasses the fear of losing power and I do the work "It's the last minute!"
Inertia. Procrastination. Outsiders call it laziness, cowardice, poor time management. Insert negative spin adjectives here. I have brain damage. Yippee except not really something to celebrate except (so many exceptions, so little time) for the validation, the ease away from the self-judgment, sort of. That is the huge gift of the eeg. So, come on brain!!! Let's get building and growing!