I just "caught" my company smoking in our house. I said "That's not good" and "Please don't smoke in the house". My husband said "Go to bed Kelly". Nice. I just spent an hour listening to entirely inappropriate jokes, did not laugh (they weren't funny) and now for some reason it's ok for him to smoke in my house. Doesn't matter that I've asked my husband not to, I thought it was a reasonable assumption that he would respect my wishes.
So they're all mad and I am no doubt the bitch - sometime i just fucking hate the entitlement of men. I said "There is a great big yard outside for you to smoke in". So now, the part I really hate, the part where I buy into the "I'm a bitch".
I feel like I am three and I just disagreed with my angry dad. I feel afraid, I feel unjust. And I didn't do anything wrong.
Fuck I wish I was more assertive. This is small small shit and I feel devastated. This is the kind of shit that sends me reeling into bad scary trap-laden places.
christmas past - it's a few weeks yet 'til christmas, but we are putting up the tree tonight. this is unplanned, but the tree is in the yard, up against the house, and why ...
1 week ago