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Wednesday, November 19, 2014

I just want to feel better

sleep, sort of, woke up laying in bed awake, have an appt to see GP for referral to psych and I guess new meds, it's clear I need something. I just don't know what's out there that maybe could work with no side effects, but I'm thinking that's impossible . If I introduce a foreign substance into my system I can expect my system t odo weird shit in response.

Thinking about suicide thinking I couldn't beat the hurt I would cause, so I just feel more trapped.

I just want to feel better.

Like anyone who is ill.


  1. Awww Kel. Dear, sweet, awesome Kelly, who thinks always of other people before herself. I am so glad you are going to the doctor, and unbelievably happy you're seeking out meds again. I know, they're awful, they are (my memory has disappeared, basically) but they allow me to be a happy human, so to me it's worth the side-effects. Hoping you find the happy human inside yourself sooner rather than later. Love you a whole bunch. ox

  2. Thanks Cath, day 3 for cymbalta, no headache today so that's encouraging. Hugs