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Friday, September 23, 2011

Don't be alarmed - in the event of a real emergency, etc.

Why suicide "note"? Isn't it an immediate pass to "Take this seriously"Does it not earn the magnitude of the moniker "Letter", "Manifesto"?

"Note" sounds casual, like it's less dangerous, less worthy of note (sorry), like calling violence in relationships "domestic", like you could buy a 25 pack at the card store. That'd be something. "This is our new suicide section" "Do you have something in suicides?""Thought of you while drowning/falling/jumping/cutting"

Did they leave a note? Yeah. F#. Or maybe that's just a bad key.

Sadly, been imagining what I might say. Something like: Thank you for loving me, sorry I didn't share your good opinion of me.

Bad mornings - too many in a row. Observing myself from a safe distance. Not even the 500+ dolphins made a dent but thanks anyway universe for trying.

Something please register, other than sad things I mean.
I've been imagining really horrific accidents, involving people/dogs I love. I think I'm looking for a concrete "excuse" for what I am feeling, because nothing is making sense. But then, what does?

Really difficult to imagine what use this can all be.

again. fuck.

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